‘Tis the beginning of wedding season! The holidays fill the Internet with videos of surprise proposals, engagement photoshoots, and grooms crying at the first sight of their bride walking down the aisle. Winter is preparation for those big days to debut in the summer.
I am a certified sap, so seeing anything even remotely romantic just makes me into a puddle of mush.
Being that I was married before and did not have the best experience at all (AT. ALL.) I think a lot of people are under the impression that I would be anti-marriage/anti-men. So many people just lose all hope after they go through a bad breakup or a messy divorce and usually for good reason. They make you ice any and all possibility of a connection completely out. My situation was probably the least ideal on the levels of shittiness, yet here I am, gushing over proposal vids and smiling like its me in those recordings.
Sometimes they do sting and hit a sore spot. Who wouldn’t feel a little sad when they reflect on what did or didn’t happen? But at the end of the day I’m hopeful. Sure I think 89% of men are cheaters (probably higher, duh) but I am extremely hopeful that within that 11% of faithful ones, there’s the one for me who will be a compliment to my little family and feel as passionately about pizza and Afrobeats as I do. He may not come around until I’m 65, but he’s out there. I love love and I enjoy seeing those who are ear deep in it. My time will come eventually. Sometimes terrible experiences can open brand new doors. Just busy those mf’s wide open. I hope my myself and others who have been through heartache have big ass doors blasted open for us to allow us to step into love, but with a new outlook.
Speaking of the L word (“love”, not the HBO series)…One of my best friends recently got engaged and asked me to be one of her bridesmaid and I was so elated!
(Please excuse how rough I look. I’d make an excuse, but this is actually how I look everyday.)
It’s so flattering that someone wants you to be a part of such a special day. I’m ready to ugly cry, dance the night away, and support my friend and her fiancé in celebrating their love.
I told y’all I was a sap.
How did you cope with dating, the idea of love, or marriage after a breakup of divorce. Let me know!